


Processing

by DRHPaints



Series: Willy and Suzy [2]
Category: Bill Hader - Fandom, The To Do List (2013)
Genre: Angst, Blow Jobs, Brief Mention of Suicide, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Marijuana, Robbery, Smut, Therapy, Threat of Sexual Violence, Trauma Work, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, mild physical violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:08:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26808661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DRHPaints/pseuds/DRHPaints
Summary: When Suzy is mugged and nearly attacked while Willy is inside buying weed, he feels incredibly guilty that he wasn’t able to intervene earlier.
Relationships: Willy McLean/Original Female Character
Series: Willy and Suzy [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1969177
Comments: 3
Kudos: 5





	Processing

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pockets_full_of_posies](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pockets_full_of_posies/gifts).



> This fic is a follow up to another one I wrote entitled ‘Helping Hand’. I recommend reading that first at the link below.
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/26745493

Ancient sedan rolling to a stop in front of the crumbling house, Willy turned to Suzy. “Alright, I’m going to go grab the stuff from Tommy. Do you just want to wait here? He can be kind of…” Willy made a face. “Creepy around women sometimes. Sorry.”

“Oh, okay. Sure.” Leaning across the center console to give her a kiss on the cheek, Willy smiled and shut the car door behind him, Suzy watching as he flip-flopped his way up the warped steps. After a minute or so a tired-looking young man ushered him inside and Willy disappeared. 

This wasn’t the first time Suzy accompanied Willy on a weed-run during their couple months of dating, though it was the first time they came to this particular part of town where her mother refused to leave the car unoccupied in parking lots. 

So far things with Willy were going well. Before Suzy got her new job cashiering at the grocery store, there were two glorious weeks of uninterrupted time in which they saw one another constantly. Suzy would lounge around the pool all day, Willy’s lack of enthusiasm for his position blatantly obvious as they flirted in the employee stand, sat on the pool’s edge, feet dangling in the water as they discussed their lives, and got high before fooling around in the utility shack, Willy’s large hand forced to clamp over Suzy’s mouth more than once in an effort to muffle her screams from the patrons just outside the door.

After a few minutes, Willy hadn’t returned and Suzy supposed, as was the custom with many dealers, he got roped into getting high with Tommy before he could walk away with his purchase. Glancing around bored, it startled Suzy a little when her phone buzzed in her pocket.

“Hey mom.” Suzy answered, seeing her title on the screen.

“Hey Suz...I...you...go...st...and...me..re...napkins…”

Frowning, Suzy took the phone away and frowned at it before pressing it to her ear firmly. “Mom, you’re breaking up. I can’t hear you.”

“Nee..mo...kins. Ca...ou...at...tore?”

Shaking her head at the static, Suzy stepped out of the car. “Hang on mom, I’m going to try to get a better signal.” Walking a few feet away, Suzy covered her other ear with her hand. “Mom? Are you still there?”

“Ye...Can..ou...ear...me?..”

Suzy sighed, going further. “No, I can’t. What?”

“Nee...kins...broth...arty…” 

“Mom, I’m sorry. I’ll call back when I’m in a place with better reception, okay?” Barely able to make out her mother’s garbled response, Suzy said goodbye and hung up, shoving her phone back in her pocket.

“Hey there.” 

Turning around, a mountain of a man stood before her, shadow outlined by the one functioning streetlight on the decrepit avenue. Hands in his pockets, his head was tilted curiously at Suzy and he seemed to be chewing, some substance or another rolling around in his heavy jaw.

“Hello.” Suzy attempted to keep her tone airy, polite as the man continued to stare at her, standing between Suzy and the car.

Even though Suzy could only see the whites of his eyes, she could sense them traveling gradually up from her shoes to her face. “What’s a pretty young thing like you doing out here so late?”

“I…” Swallowing, Suzy’s body tensed. “I’m just waiting for my boyfriend.”

“Boyfriend, eh?” The man looked slowly from side to side. “I don’t see him.” 

Suzy raised a finger, willing it not to shake. “He’s inside. He’ll be out soon.”

“Well, in the meantime…” The man took a step forward, his hulking frame expanding in Suzy’s view as she froze with fear. “Give me your purse.”

Nodding, Suzy hastily removed it from her shoulder and held it out, the man snatching it from her grasp. “Phone, too.”

Suzy passed it to him, taking a step backward as he took it. “Okay, just…” Lifting her hands, Suzy’s voice was tremulous. ”Just take it and go, okay? Please. Don’t hurt me.”

”Oh…” Deep chuckle rumbling up from his chest, the man advanced toward her, mouth spreading into a wicked smile. “I’m not gonna hurt you. I’m gonna make you feel  _ so good.” _

Ears ringing and body quaking, Suzy looked to Tommy’s house and did the only thing that occurred to her panic-ridden brain. She screamed. “WILLY! WILLY! HELP! PLEASE! ANYBODY! WILLY!”

A light flicked on in the house immediately to her right out of the corner of her eye as the man’s pincer-like hands closed around her upper arms, and Suzy saw a shadow pass by the window. A flicker of hope rose inside of her as she was immersed in his smell, all cigarettes and brown alcohol and neglected showers as dirty fingers covered Suzy’s mouth. 

But then the light went out and inside Suzy rose a potent horror that ate away at her marrow. Struggling, she kicked out her foot and managed to strike the man’s shin. He winced, dropping his hold over Suzy’s lips and immediately she shouted again. “WILLY! HELP! SOMEONE! PLEASE! WILLY!”

Tommy’s front door opening, a disoriented Willy glanced up and down the street and when he caught sight of Suzy thrashing under the hold of her attacker, he broke into a run. “HEY!” Willy roared, closing the gap between them. “Get the fuck away from her!”

Seeing Willy’s rageful advance, the man released his hold on Suzy and shot off into the shadows, her purple purse dangling behind him as he ran. Willy attempted to pursue, but his flip flops were no match for the man’s velocity and soon he came jogging back to Suzy where she sat on the curb, hand to her chest and trying to breathe.

“Suzy? Suzy, look at me. Are you okay?” Willy knelt beside her, combing back her hair.

“I...I don’t know…” Suzy managed to squeak out, shaking her head.

Joining her on the curb, Willy placed a large hand just above her belly, the other one tipping her chin up, forcing Suzy’s darting eyes to meet his own. “Look at me, alright? Breathe, okay? Suzy? Breathe into my hand, right here.” Pressing a little on her solar plexus, Willy’s eyes were pools of dark blue calm rimmed in red and he demonstrated inhaling and exhaling for Suzy in an exaggerated manner until hers hitched only a little.

“Do you think you can make it back to the car if I help you?” Rubbing small circles into her back, Willy’s voice was soft and Suzy nodded. Arm around her waist, Willy walked them back and opened the door for Suzy before hopping around and getting inside. Leaning over he took her hands. “Suzy, what happened out there? Can you tell me about it?”

“I, um…” Voice wavering, Suzy could sense her eyes stinging and she wondered why, now of all moments, was the time her brain decided to cry and not earlier. “I got out of the car because my mom called and I couldn’t hear her very well, and...and then he was...he was behind me and he…” Letting go of one of Willy’s hands, Suzy wiped her face. “He took my purse. And my phone. And then he was gonna…” Trembling hand covering her mouth, Suzy shook her head, closed eyes sending rivulets of tears down her cheeks.

“Fuck.” Willy whispered, fingers tightening around her own. “I can’t believe that I just…” Shaking his head, Willy swallowed hard. “I left you out here alone. You were dealing with that fucking monster and I was in there getting high.” Elbow on the door, Willy ran a hand over his stubbled face. Facing Suzy again, he cupped her cheek. “I am so sorry. I should’ve been here for you.”

Suzy interlaced their fingers. “I’m just glad you showed up when you did. I was...I was screaming, and…” Voice growing thick again, she shook her head. “It was like no one could hear me. I was so scared, Willy.” Covering her eyes, Suzy started to sob.

“Okay, okay…” Gathering her into his strong arms, Willy rubbed Suzy’s back and planted a kiss to the top of her head. “You're safe now, alright? It’s going to be okay.” Willy let Suzy exhaust herself until there was a wet spot on the shoulder of his faded t-shirt and she sat back with eyes even more red and puffy than his own. 

Giving her shoulder a squeeze, Willy looked at Suzy. “Should we go to the police station? File a report?”

“Um…” Suzy raised an eyebrow at him. “Should you really be around police right now?”

“Oh. Right.” Willy nodded. “Well. I’ll just wait in the car then. Or I can take a quick shower and then we can go.” 

Shaking her head, Suzy held Willy’s hand. “Can we go tomorrow? I’m worn out after all of that. I just want to go home and get in bed.”

“Of course.” Willy brought Suzy back to her apartment, where she shucked off her clothes, donning pajamas and climbing under the covers. Laying in Willy’s reassuring arms, Suzy could only hope the terrifying man she encountered wouldn’t invade her dreams as she drifted.

The next morning, sober and in an outfit that didn’t reek of marijuana, Willy drove Suzy to the police station. For practicalitie’s sake he kept a couple of outfits at her place these days. Even though they’d been together for a while, Suzy couldn’t get Willy to admit he lived at the pool. At first she tried asking leading questions, hoping Willy would see it was safe to tell her, that she wouldn’t judge him, but he skirted the issue expertly, even though it was painfully obvious.

Sitting and waiting for someone to take her statement, the time ticked by and eventually Suzy glanced up at the clock and turned to Willy, concerned. “Wait...don’t you have to go open up soon?” 

“Nah.” Willy shook his head and lowered his voice. “I told Rusty I’d give him a dime if he covered for me. It’s fine.”

Suzy was touched. With only one, maybe two weeks left before the pool would close due to the weather, Willy giving up a day’s pay for her sake was meaningful, particularly since, to her knowledge, and she was nervous about asking him, Willy didn’t have another job lined up or somewhere to sleep once those gates locked for the Fall.

A grizzled officer took down their information and description of the attack, neither his demeanor nor his words leaving them with much confidence as Suzy and Willy left the station.

“Wow, he...he didn’t seem to think they were going to catch the guy, huh?” Suzy mentioned after Willy opened the door for her and they got in the car.

Sighing, Willy shook his head. “No, not really. But…” Willy’s large hands tightened on the steering wheel, knuckles going white. “If I ever see that fucker again, he’ll wish the goddamn police found him first.”

Suzy blinked in surprise at the expression on Willy’s face. His handsome features were contorted to the point of ferality. Stormy blue eyes wide, the slightly smaller left one twitched as his nose flared, lip curling into a snarl and exposing his rounded teeth. Speaking through gritted teeth, the muscles in his sharp jaw jumped and the vein in his forehead throbbed.

Suzy never saw Willy angry before. It simply didn’t happen. A lackadaisical man by nature, there didn’t seem to be much in the word that got to Willy. Sure, he would get irritated, or even annoyed by an overbearing pool patron or the squads of children who didn’t follow the rules, but aside from a lot of scoffing and eye rolling, it rarely provoked a response.

So to see him sitting beside her, a font of fury, some biological need to protect sparked within him and blown to a raging inferno, was somewhat alarming. And though Suzy didn’t like to admit it, even to herself, a bit arousing as well.

Returning to her apartment, Suzy and Willy spent the day undergoing the arduous task of cancelling and replacing her credit cards, ID, phone, and any other necessary items that were carried off in her purse. After at least a dozen phone calls and a ridiculous amount of time spent on hold, Suzy thought she had everything covered. 

When they snuggled together in bed that night, Willy’s arm around her with her back to him, he brushed a kiss to her neck. And then another.

Suzy gave his hand a squeeze. “Hey, um…” Flipping over, in the darkness it was difficult to discern Willy’s expression. “Do you mind if we...hold off for a bit? I'm sorry. I’m just still a little...shaken up, or whatever. From what happened.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Willy threaded Suzy’s hair behind her ear. “Take all the time you need, okay? I can wait.”

“Thank you.” Suzy smiled, scratching under his stubbled chin.

Lifting his head, Willy looked around the room. “Would you be more comfortable sleeping alone? I can go. Or camp out on the couch if you’d—“

“No.” Shaking her head, Suzy rested a hand on his firm chest. “I want you here. I think I’d be too scared to sleep alone right now.”

“Yeah, that makes sense.” Willy nodded. They were quiet for a moment until Willy’s voice spoke into the darkness and broke the silence. “I still…” Pausing, when he started again his voice was soft and difficult to discern, as if he were trying to hide the words, even from himself. “I still can’t believe I wasn’t there to help you. I just...I just keep thinking, ‘What if I hadn’t come outside?’ You know? And I can’t…” Taking a deep breath, Willy released a shuddering exhale. “Fuck, I’d never be able to forgive myself, Suz.”

Suzy touched his arm. “But you did show up. So let’s not think about that, alright?”

“Fuck, I’m sorry.” Covering his face with both hands, Willy shook his head. “I just made that about me. Fuck, that was really shitty.” Reaching out to brush back Suzy’s hair, Willy adjusted the pillow under his head. “How are you holding up?”

Suzy lifted a shoulder. “It’s kind of hard to tell, honestly. When I think about what happened it’s like…” Suzy extended a hand, fingers groping in the air as if trying to catch the words. “It’s like it was a dream. Or it happened to someone else. It just…” Shaking her head, Suzy lowered her arm. “It doesn’t feel real yet, I guess.”

“Are you going to talk to Helen about it?” Helen was Suzy’s therapist. When she first casually mentioned an exchange with Helen in therapy, she expected Willy’s eyes to glass over and for him to tune out, as he did when she discussed the problems in her girlfriend's love lives. She couldn’t blame him there, after all, the issues were constant and varying and they weren’t his friends. But in regards to Helen, Willy showed immediate interest, asking her if therapy was going well, if she thought Helen was a good match, and what kinds of things they worked on.

When Suzy expressed her surprise, Willy solemnly explained that he lost one of his high school buddies to suicide. As is so often the case, there was no clear warning and so Willy stated he was comforted to know people in his life were in therapy. Since then, after her sessions she would often debrief Willy, sharing one anecdote or another, and he would even remind her of things throughout the week if Suzy discussed something that bothered her, gently saying, “Maybe you should put that on your list for Helen, too.”

“Yeah, I actually was able to get an earlier appointment with her this week.” Suzy nodded.

“Great.” Willy smiled. “I’m sure she’ll be helpful.”

And she was. After Suzy explained what happened, Helen was kind enough to offer a double session, setting aside her lunch hour to help Suzy work through her thoughts and feelings surrounding the attack. Agreeing to meet twice a week for a while for additional support, Suzy left Helen’s office alleviated but vulnerable, like an exposed crab scuttling across the sand to a new shell, seeking safety as rapidly as possible at home. 

Car puttering to a stop outside of her building, Willy came up and they ordered a pizza, Willy spilling on his light brown shorts by the second slice. “So…” He chewed, picking off a piece of pepperoni to eat individually. “How did it go with Helen today?”

“Good.” Nodding, Suzy finished off her crust. “Hard, but good. She said that I’ll probably find new things upsetting as I go along, things that’ll spark flashbacks to what happened, and it might be stuff that I wouldn’t expect.”

“Huh.” Willy turned down the corners of his mouth appraisingly. “That makes sense.”

“She also…” Chewing the inside of her lip, Suzy set down her pizza. “Well, we talked about you for a while today.”

Lowering his slice mid-bite, Willy chewed, swallowed, and wiped his fingers on his faded navy shirt. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, I, um…” Suzy squirmed a little. “Well, I told her we hadn’t had sex since it happened.”

“Oh okay.” Willy sounded slightly relieved. “What did she have to say about that? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Well, she, um...first she asked me if I was feeling sexual or not. Since then.” Nodding, Willy’s sapphire eyes were patient and Suzy continued. “And at first I wasn’t sure. But then we talked about you some more, about why I find you attractive, things like that.”

Willy giggled. “Yeah, that’s one you’re gonna have to explain to me someday as well.”

Suzy playfully hit his arm and gave him a chiding smile. “Aw, come on.” Leaning back, Suzy continued. “Well, anyway, I have been feeling sexual, just afraid to, you know, express it. So Helen and I discussed that and she mentioned that if I wanted to have sex with you, it might be a good idea…” Meeting Willy’s oceanic gaze, Suzy swallowed. “To do it sooner rather than later, because the fear might make it harder the longer I put it off.”

Willy blinked. “Alright. I get that. But I really don’t want you to do anything until you’re ready, Suz.”

“Thank you.” Suzy nodded. “I think I am, though. I just…” Holding up her hands, Suzy bit her lip. “Well, I think I need to do it on my own terms. At least at first.”

Furrowing his brow in confusion, Willy tilted his head. “What do you mean?”

“Well, like…” Mouth hanging open for a moment, Suzy tried to gather her thoughts. “Like I want to call the shots. Maybe be on top, you know…”

Eyebrows raising briefly, Willy smirked. “I have no problem with that.”

“And maybe...maybe just ask before you do stuff, alright? Like...when we first started.”

“Of course.” Willy nodded. “Not a problem.”

“Okay, good.” Smiling, Suzy looked across the pizza at Willy, air silent and tense for a moment. “So...should we go to my room?”

“Yes.” Standing quickly, Suzy chuckled at his enthusiasm as they went down the hall. Once inside, she slowly approached Willy, locked into his cobalt eyes as she grabbed the hem of his t-shirt and peeled it overhead. Undoing his fly, she lowered his shorts to the ground along with his boxers. There was someting about Willy holding still, looking at her with a patiently hungry expression while allowing her to undress him that was deeply erotic, and after Suzy admired his body. Suzy’s fingers flowed over his strong arms, firm chest, trickling through his dark body hair, caressing his little belly, before ghosting over his mostly soft cock.

“You wanna lay down?” She gestured to the mattress and Willy nodded, climbing in and resting on his back. Disrobing, Suzy crawled in after him, straddling Willy and threading her fingers through his long, silky hair. Cock thickening beneath her, Suzy reached down and spread the lips of her pussy, notching him in between before she began to glide back and forth. 

Willy’s chest rose with desire as he stared up at her, hands balled into fists at his sides as Suzy’s continued to roam over his pale skin, tracing his sharp jawline, his prominent cheekbone, the curve of his lower lip. 

Wide head of his cock skipping tantalizingly over her clit, Suzy ground herself down harder and an audible sigh escaped them both as Willy’s hips began to rise. “Can I…” Eyes closed for a moment, Willy licked and folded his lips. “Can I touch you?”

“Yeah.” Suzy nodded, picking up his sizable hands and placing them on her thighs. Hooking around to her ass, Willy thrust himself against her as Suzy bent down to capture his light pink lips, tongue twirling as soft mewls grew in her throat. 

Reaching back to grab one of his hands, Suzy held his fingers between her thighs and shifted to the side. Willy circled her clit carefully, coaxing Suzy until she rocked into his touch.

Pumping his cock, Suzy ran the ball of her thumb over his sensitive head and the soft noise it elicited from Willy’s mouth spurred her on. Removing his hand from between her legs, Suzy caught Willy’s eye. “I want to suck you.”

“Okay.” Willy smiled and Suzy shuffled down the bed. Wrapping her lips around his thick cock, Suzy sank down, hollowing her cheeks and pressing her tongue to the underside of his shaft as she stroked Willy into her mouth. “Fuck, Suz. That feels so damn good…” Willy breathed, fighting to keep his hips flat on the mattress and his fingers in the sheets.

Suzy enjoyed the act of going down on Willy. Not only did she like the control, seeing what a flick of her tongue or a squeeze of her fingers could provoke in his elongated body, but his vulnerability during the act was exquisite. Willy went through the world holding a thin shield of sarcasm and apathy, but in these moments, that shattered, and an authentic Willy shone through, one unafraid to be weak, one who didn’t feel the need to reach for the punchline, and Suzy found she adored this genuine Willy immensely.

She continued her ministrations until a series of high whimpers tumbled from Willy’s lips, rising and wiping her mouth before laying on her side next to him. After gathering a breath, Willy turned to face her and Suzy timidly tossed a leg over his waist, lassoing him in and burying the fingers of one hand in his dark tendrils.

Wedging her arm between them, Suzy glanced down and grasped Willy’s cock. She wasn’t entirely sure why, as it certainly wasn’t the most advantageous position, but as she slid herself onto Willy while they faced one another in bed, there was a comfort and security in the familiarity of seeing his blue-eyed, smiling face staring at her from across the pillow.

Ankle hooked behind his thigh, Suzy drove herself forward, grabbing behind Willy’s small love handle to steady herself. Willy looked between them at their joined bodies. “You want me to touch you?”

“Yeah.” Suzy nodded feverishly. “Please.”

Fingers finding her clit, Willy spun over her as Suzy continued to undulate her body. “You can…” She cupped Willy’s stubbled jaw. “You can move, too. I’m okay.”

“Alright.” Free hand kneading the skin of her ass, Willy surged forward. “If you need me to stop, or slow down, you just let me know, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah. Okay.” Suzy grinned before fusing their mouths together, tongues dancing as their bodies became a perpetual wave of passion. 

Moaning against Willy’s lips, Suzy pulsed rapidly, seeking friction and clinging to his vast shoulder as she rested her cheek against his, stubble chafing. “ _ Oh Willy! Yes! Just like that! Don’t stop!” _

Racing over her clit, Willy grit his teeth, toes curling and kicking at the sheets in an attempt to hold on. “ _ Fuck, Suzy! Fuck! Yes!” _

“ _ Willy! I’m gonna cum! Yes! Fuck! Yes! _ ” Constricting around him, Suzy shook, fingertips digging into the flesh of Will’s back as she panted against his ear. 

Squirming beside her, Willy made incredibly odd high pitched noises of distress. Were Suzy not so breathless she might’ve laughed at the expression on his face, features scrunched except for his hopelessly twitching left eye. “Suz, I’m...I’m really close. Do…” Puffing out his cheeks, Willy exhaled slowly. “Do you want me to stop?”

“No, that’s okay, Willy.” She stroked back his hair. “Keep going.”

“Oh thank goodness.” Not wanting to overwhelm her, as he continued to sense Suzy’s aftershocks around him, instead of laying her flat and getting on top as he often would, Willy rolled onto his back, hips leaping as he whined and thrashed. “ _ Suzy! Fuck! Yeah! I’m gonna cum! Fuck! FUCK! _ ” 

Freezing and airless for a moment, Willy gripped her hips firmly, before falling back with a shiver, warm cum draining inside of Suzy as he deflated.

Suzy folded over to kiss his parted lips, Willy blinking his deep blue eyes open and smiling. Once she climbed off, Suzy resumed her position facing Willy on the bed and they grinned at one another.

“Are you okay?” Willy’s fingers snuck across the sheet to intertwine with her own.

Nodding, Suzy gave Willy’s hand a squeeze. “I will be.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read! If you enjoyed this story, please leave a comment or come say hi on tumblr at fandomtransmandom. I also take requests!


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